By Matt Cace
People will tend to warm up to a person who shows interest in them, not a person who loves talking about themselves all the time.
In addition to a positive appearance, there is another “important” factor to consider when it comes to making an impact on a man. Ready? Show him your genuine interest. This is powerfully effective because all men have a tendency to open up when they encounter “genuine” interest in them. When you show that you are truly interested in him and his world, you’d be putting him on an air balloon.
YOUR GENUINE INTEREST WILL MAKE OTHERS FEEL GOOD
1. Ask Questions
Asking questions is a sign of showing interest in a person. People like it when they are asked questions about them; it shows that you are important and special and mean something to them.
When you ask questions it simply shows that you are trying to get to know the person better. This, however, will not work when you are only asking questions to get them to like you. People could sense you are asking questions “out of duty” when you don’t show genuine interest. You need to genuinely be interested and take the time to listen. Go ahead and ask about the person’s likes, hobbies, dislikes, and favorite meals with follow-up questions to their responses. This will show that you are truly interested.
2. Pay Attention When He Speaks
Paying attention involves listening and not just listening with your ear but with your entire body. When he speaks, don’t just nod and smile while thinking about what you want to say next… but truly listen to what he is saying, maintain eye contact and internalize each word before asking any follow-up questions.
Listening is a part of body language. Try to lean in closer, maintain eye contact with the person and ensure you keep all distractions at bay. Pulling out your cell phone is a no-no when the person is talking to you. Make sure he has your undivided attention. This is an important skill that goes a very long way and will surely make you likable.
Research Shows: 74% of Men Are More Attracted to Women Who Do This One Thing
3. Be Optimistic
A lot of people tend to overlook the good qualities in others and magnify the flaws. Taking the time to see a person’s good qualities is important, especially when you make the conclusion that you too are not perfect. We can easily get caught up in our own issues that we forget how important it is to pay someone a compliment.
Giving a warm compliment to someone will lift someone’s spirits and they will automatically begin to like you. Make sure your compliments are genuine because saying good things just to make people feel good never ends well. You can easily be portrayed as being fake and untrustworthy.
Pay a compliment whenever you see good quality in someone, it might be his fashion sense, good sense of humor, or even his charming smile. Focusing on a person’s good qualities will draw them towards you immediately.
4. Ask for His Opinions and Advice
Making someone feel useful by asking for their opinion will make them feel appreciated. Men especially love being helpful and feeling useful.
Does he know about certain things well? Ask for his opinion on that matter. If it’s about movies, ask him to help you find the best movie to watch. Ask him about the best computer to buy. Whatever it is, show him you genuinely want to get his assistance for what you’re asking. After getting his useful opinion, don’t forget to show him your appreciation. This will show that you value his thoughts and you would have earned more points than you think.
READ MORE: See why men are motivated to be your hero.
5. Good Sense of Humor
Humor is not a trait that most people have. Granted, some people try to be funny but fail miserably at it, but if you are among the few who have a sense of humor then use it to your advantage. Men like being around a woman with a good sense of humor… someone who makes them laugh and not think about their problems for a few minutes. Laughter is the medicine to heartache and it bonds friends and families. Good humor creates a comfortable atmosphere and this will make him open up and feel free around you.
6. Empathize
Walking a mile in someone’s shoes is not just a way to get someone to like you but it’s a way to get them to open up. It creates a deeper connection between you and a person you like.
When you tap into someone’s feelings and begin to see the world from his perspective, you give him the gift of understanding and acceptance. So, pay attention to your man’s needs and emotions. He will deeply appreciate your empathy.
7. Set Aside Quality Time
Quality time is important for any relationship to thrive. Your bond with him will grow over time. If you haven’t really had opportunities to spend time with him, arrange a date with him. Go out for coffee, ice cream… something simple as watching a movie and getting to know what genre he prefers and what music he likes listening to. But don’t let your conversations just be about food and movies. Spend enough time with him to really get to know him.
Remember that it’s difficult for him to get to like you deeply if you have not gotten a chance to spend time together through various circumstances and moods.
BE YOURSELF
8. Avoid Being Fake
Fakeness has an expiry date. Most people tend to put their best feet forward when meeting someone new or when trying to get someone to like them. This is never a good thing because people can spot fakeness from a mile away and you will never really know whether or not the person will like the real you or the fake you. When you are trying to show interest in the things that he likes just to impress him, you are not only wasting your time but his as well.
If you need to be fake for a guy to like you, then that is a red flag. You are pretending to be something you are not and if he ends up liking the fake you… then you may have to pretend for a very long time. This, in turn, becomes too exhausting for you and your confidence will go down the drain.
Now, this doesn’t mean that you let a guy know about your worst qualities from the get-go. In fact, we should always try our best not only for others but for ourselves… but let’s stick to who we are. Are you the quiet and collective type or a bubbly hyper type? It doesn’t matter. Be you. The right man will love your qualities as they are.
9. Be Vulnerable
Being vulnerable creates a deeper connection between the two of you. It’s ok to display your flaws and imperfection. Fear always tries to interfere with this part of the relationship, but get past it. It’s truly rewarding in a relationship if you meet the right man. Of course, you don’t have to spill out your guts initially. Start small. You will be surprised just how far allowing yourself to be vulnerable will make him appreciate your and like you more.
10. Maintain Your Self-Respect
It goes without saying, if you want others to respect you, you first need to have self-respect. This will show in you and your lifestyle… the way you restrain yourself and avoid degrading situations. By this, people will respect you and like you.
Self-respect comes with boundaries, so make sure you know what they are and don’t be afraid to enforce them. If you are insecure and needy, you will be tempted to cross over your boundaries to earn other’s affection and attention. If this is your weakness, you’ll need to work on it because you are only hurting yourself in the long run.
You do not need to compromise yourself and trip over the burden of pleasing people all the time. This will not make anyone like you in a way you need to be liked.
First, value yourself. Then he will see the value in you.
11. Honest Communication
Honesty is always the best policy, do not try to hide behind lies in order to get him to like you. If you don’t like sushi, let him know. If you do not like the hard metal rock he is into, let him know that as well. We are all different and we also differ in tastes and preferences. Being honest saves you a lot of time. You don’t have to say something that you think he wants to hear for him to like you. At the same time, there is no need to be abrasive or rude to be honest.
Honesty is an impactful character trait. It goes hand in hand with integrity. More people tend to want to be around someone who has integrity. Stretching the truth, lying, or trying to be someone you are not will always downplay your character.
12. Don’t Strive for Perfection
No one is perfect in this world and you are no exception. You should first understand that no one wants to be around a perfect person because it brings out their own imperfect insecurities. Besides, being perfect is boring.
We are bound by our imperfections and when someone realizes that you are not perfect, they will easily become vulnerable with you. A comfortable feeling also arises and this encourages them to hang out with you more. In its own way, being perfect sounds a bit judgmental and trying to strive for perfection makes you come off as a bit fake. Acknowledging your flaws make you relatable and fun to be around.
READ MORE: See why men don’t want perfect.
13. Be Confident
People are genuinely attracted to confidence.
Unlike confident people, needy people are a great turn off, it often shows how desperate they are and no one wants to be around such a person.
Confidence is a wonderful trait. You may not have much to present, but when you present yourself with confidence, people will buy what you are selling. Confident people love to take good care of themselves by being well-groomed and watching their hygiene. They are also comfortable in their own skin and manage to make everyone around them comfortable.
We all have some fear of rejection and of what people think about us. That doesn’t mean you have no confidence; but with a healthy dose of confidence, you simply “overcome” them. The more you learn how to overcome your fear, the more you become courageous and bold. At the same time, you will appear to be raw and not afraid of being vulnerable. People will see that your opinions and principles won’t easily be swayed. Confidence naturally brings respect. When you have confidence, people will CHOOSE to be around you and LIKE you for the positive vibe you bring… because your presence adds value to their lives.
Keep Learning
Why men lose interest and what you can do about it. Watch the following video where one of our relationship experts James Bauer exposes common mistakes women make and reveals 7 special phrases that help trigger a man’s burning desire to devote himself to a woman. It’s something you can learn once and use for the rest of your life.
